Historically, the race conversation and topic are treacherous waters to navigate and the ‘colorblind’ approach has robbed us of the framework, language, and power to effectively address and dismantle it.
In this webinar, TED speaker and Brownicity.com creator Dr. Lucretia Berry, author of What LIES Between Us: Fostering First Steps Towards Racial Healing, describes how parents and teachers can talk to their children and students about race and race-related trauma. She also answers your questions.
Moderated by League of Education Voters Communications Director Arik Korman.
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Historically, the race conversation and topic are treacherous waters to navigate and the ‘colorblind’ approach has robbed us of the framework, language, and power to effectively address and dismantle it.
We spoke with Dr. Lucretia Berry on how parents and teachers can talk to their children and students about race and race-related trauma. Dr. Berry is the founder of Brownicity.com, an agency dedicated to advocacy, education, and support for racial healing and anti-racism. She is also the author of What LIES Between Us: Fostering First Steps Towards Racial Healing, a journey guide designed specifically for beginners on the topic. Dr. Berry also serves as the anti-racism curriculum specialist for the Community School of Davidson, North Carolina.
When to talk to kids about race
Dr. Berry believes that talking to kids about race is essential and it must start early on.
She cited research that showed kids started recognizing differences within the first three to six months of being born. Dr. Berry believes a way to combat the racial hierarchies and ways racism is prevalent in society is through having these conversations with your kids. She emphasized this while sharing that studies confirm that by the age of five, kids can observe and be cognizant of these societal racial hierarchies.
Dr. Berry lives in a biracial household, married to a white man where they are raising biracial children. She spoke about educating her children on the reality that when they leave their homes as a family, their mother may experience the world differently than their father does.
“We wanted to make sure our children already had the tools, and already had the insight,” Dr. Berry said. “Very early on, [we] normalized language around how people look, phenotypes, as early as possible.”
How do we talk to our kids about race?
Dr. Berry shared her methods of talking to her kids about race, which included the incorporation of modeled behavior, books, and on emphasizing a theme of empowerment.
“Having the conversations now gives them agency, and gives them hope,” she said.
Dr. Berry would have conversations with her husband on racism in our country in front of her children, especially recently with the movements for justice for Black lives. By modeling this behavior in open discussion, it normalizes the tendency and the need to have these conversations in their children’s minds.
She believes that by allowing her children to have an understanding of what is going on in the world, her kids will be able to grow foundations of empathy, compassion, and humanity.
Dr. Berry also recommends books, especially books that can be used to give your children language about skin tones and understand the history of racial oppression in our world.
One of the books she recommended was All the Colors We Are by Katy Kissenger, which Dr. Berry stated helps answer the “why” of our skin.
She would read these books to her kids to have them understand where their skin difference comes from, talking about melanin and their ancestor’s geographic origins. Further, she would incorporate activities to ensure that her children felt empowered and beautiful in their complexions.
Dr. Berry would have her kids name their skin tones, with the requirement being that the name they make must be a “beautiful name.” They would sing songs about their skin, glorifying and emphasizing the beauty in what they are to establish a foundation of empowerment necessary to combat oppression and to heal.
She also mentioned the “enormous power” teachers have regarding explaining race to children.
“It’s important that white teachers take this on as their own burden,” Dr. Berry said.
She recommends that teachers take the steps to uncover the truth in our history and seek out ways to incorporate anti-racist curriculum.
On racial healing
Dr. Berry believes that anti-racism involves enacting policies and practices to oppose racism. This coincides with racial healing because, in order to address racial injustice, we must also heal its effects on those it marginalizes as well.
“Racial healing is healing from the damage caused by our subjugation to the construct of racism,” Dr. Berry said. “Racial healing can occur personally, physically, socially, systemically, and economically.”
When asked about how to address racial healing and offer support for students and parents in areas that may gaslight their experiences, Dr. Berry recommended forming alliances with other parents, students, and allies.
She spoke to the importance of this by drawing from her own experiences and noting the importance of rallying together, especially in her own life where schools failed to ask the right questions for BIPOC students and families.
“In a school, I’ve never heard people say how we can help students who are experiencing racism and how can we heal,” Dr. Berry said.
As the fight for racial justice continues in our country, with students now facing the impacts of generations of trauma rooted in our country’s oppressive histories, Dr. Berry believes these questions on how to address racism and help heal students should be common.
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